Morphine

[jooles34]

Title: Morphine
Fandom: Primeval
Characters: Lester/Stephen sort of (pre-slash)
Words: 1,077
Rating, Warnings: PG
Disclaimer: Nope, don't own Primeval.
Spoilers: Season two, but of course in full Denial.
AN: This is my take on kerry_louise's prompt 'Stephen/Lester – Lester visits Stephen during his recovery, after he almost dies in the cage room'; And huge thanks to fredbassett for a super beta.

Stephen was bored. Actually he had gone past bored a couple of days ago. This was now something so beyond bored they had yet to invent for a word for it. Although, Stephen thought, as he had time on his hands, maybe he should invent a word for it.

God! He was going out of his mind. Thinking about inventing words?

It had been four days since he had been dragged out of Leek’s menagerie. He kept being told that he had been lucky to escape with his life, and he believed it. There was barely a part of his body that didn’t hurt. But, just because his body hurt and he couldn’t physically do anything, didn’t mean that his mind wasn’t still working and capable of getting bored. Very, very bored.

They had offered him morphine for the pain and he had refused. Pain he could handle, but, especially after everything that had happened, he didn’t want to have his senses dulled in any way. However, he was starting to reconsider. He’d had his formal de-brief, and Abby and Connor had been to see him and told him that everything was safe and calm now. And he had told them he didn’t want many more visitors. There were a lot of conversations to have and apologies to be made and he didn’t feel up to yet that. But that wasn’t helping the boredom. And that wasn’t helping him not to think that morphine might be a good idea after all. On that stuff he could amuse himself for hours with nothing more than his own reflection.

He sighed. And briefly considered that he should have started to keep a count of his sighs. It would have been something to do. Better than morphine.

He looked up as the door to his private room opened. He was fairly sure it wasn’t time for any medication or dressing changes. But then time moved oddly in here. However, he was particularly surprised to see Lester walk in.

Stephen wrinkled his nose and looked away.  “I said I didn’t want any visitors.”

“That’s why I left it this long. Give you time to change your mind.”

Stephen glared up in time to see Lester drop a bag of grapes unceremoniously onto the bedside table before pulling over a chair and setting it down next to the bed. Stephen didn’t miss the look of distaste on Lester’s face as he sat on the cheap plastic chair.

“Why are you here?”

Lester brushed an invisible spot off his immaculate suit jacket, artfully not looking at Stephen.

“I came to apologise.”

Stephen was taken aback and turned his body the best he could to look at Lester.

“Apologise?”

Lester took a deep breath and looked up to meet Stephen’s eyes.

“Yes. If I was a man with a bent for metaphors I would say that I dropped the ball, in fact I dropped multiple balls.”

Stephen watched with mounting surprise as Lester sighed and sagged back in his chair, a hand over his face. In those few seconds Stephen watched years etch themselves onto Lester’s face and noticed how tired he looked. A face he had always quietly found so handsome was morphing in front of him. He felt his own frown dissipate and be replaced by curiosity.

“I was caught up in my own importance, the project, how we looked to the Ministry, the public. I was so worried about what was going on outside, I stopped paying attention to what was happening inside. I am a good leader – not a nice one, but a good one. I should have noticed the rift between you and Nick and it should have concerned me. I shouldn’t have brushed off his erratic behaviour as just ‘mad professor syndrome’. And Leek. Well, I don’t even want to talk about that.”

“None of us noticed, Lester.”

“It wasn’t any of your jobs to have noticed. And it nearly got members of my team killed. More specifically, my mistakes nearly made you dino chow.”

“I was played too. Helen did a perfect number on me.”

Lester studied him for a moment before replying.

“History catches up with us all at some point or another and we never know how we’ll react.”

“I felt like everyone else was slipping away from me; she acted like she understood me. She was just very good at saying what I wanted to hear.”

“And Leek was the perfect lackey. I didn’t suspect him for a moment.”

“I’m going to choose to assume that Leek didn’t distract you with sex.” Stephen gave a self-depreciating smile.

Lester’s eyes widened for a moment before a wry smile crossed his face and he shook his head.

“I may be flexible in my tastes, but not that flexible. At least your double-crossing was clearly more enjoyable than mine.”

“My injuries are better than yours too.” Stephen grinned.

“You’re right. Mine pale into insignificance next to yours.”

“Maybe we should compare scars sometime.” Stephen smiled again.

Lester hesitated, his smile faltering and for a moment he looked embarrassed.

“Maybe.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean…I mean, I wasn’t… Not that I wouldn’t, but…I’m going to stop talking now.”

Something bright glimmered in Lester’s eyes for a moment, then faded and the tired smile came back.

“Don’t worry. We’ll blame whatever painkillers they have you on. Morphine or something I should assume.” Lester stood up hurriedly and turned to the door. “Speaking of which, you must be tired; I should leave you alone.”

“No! You don’t have to.” Stephen was surprised by how much he wanted the other man to stay.

Lester paused and gave him a confused look.

“I have been here for four days, I’m bored and I understand I missed a great story involving you, an automatic rifle, a future predator and a mammoth.”

 “I’m sorry, I have a meeting to go to.”

Stephen bit his lip as his heart fell more than he expected.

“But I could come back later. It is a very good story.” Some of the years that had settled on him earlier, lifted themselves from Lester’s face and his eyes brightened again.

“Thanks,” Stephen said, and meant it.

He watched Lester let himself out of the room. Just before the door shut he called out to him.

“I’m not even on morphine.”

The surprised, but happy, smile he got in response from Lester was better than any painkiller ever could have been.