jooles34: (Ianto Lester)
[personal profile] jooles34
Title: Battle of the Pin Stripes
Fandom: Torchwood/Primeval
Characters: Ianto, Lester
Words: 2,126
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Nope, don't own Torchwood or Primevel.
Spoilers: None
AN: This is my Christmas gift to
[livejournal.com profile] ravenja1170who wanted a hurt/comfort free Torchwood/Primeval crossover. Happy Christmas and I hope you enjoy!



Ianto was going to enjoy today if it killed him. Though being away from Cardiff there was less chance of anything killing him, which certainly helped to improve his mood.

Plus he was on his way to one of his favourite places, which always cheered him up and he was treating himself to a day of decadence. He was in a first-class train carriage from Cardiff to London, had booked an early afternoon tea for himself at the Ritz and would then make his way to his afternoon appointment. Even better, he was on his own, with no one to bother him, badger him or otherwise get on his nerves.

Well. Except for the man sitting opposite him.

The man sitting opposite him who had worn a scowl for the entire journey so far and was speaking loudly into a mobile phone.

“I don’t care if he hasn’t slept in two days, I don’t much care if he never sleeps again. How am I supposed to explain to the Minister that the project’s not complete? ‘Sorry Minister, we would have had this done, but our drop-out student excuse for a technical head insisted on some cocoa, a little lie down and a bedtime story.’”

Ianto winced at the way the man’s voice rose at the end of the conversation. He wouldn’t like to be on the receiving end of a tirade from this man.

Quiet descended on the carriage again as the man, the only other occupant of the carriage, paused for a moment to let whoever was getting this ear bashing to reply.

“Can I help you?” he asked suddenly. “No Leek, I’m not talking to you, I’m talking to the man sitting opposite me who suddenly seems very interested in my conversation. Am I saying something to interest you?”

Ianto was startled. He hadn’t realised he had been staring. He quickly looked out of the window.

“No, he’s no-one. I think he’s snuck into first-class. He’s far too young to be here. I’m sure the guard will throw him off shortly. It takes more than a mediocre suit to make someone suitable for first-class….yes I know you agree with me Leek. That’s what I pay you for. It certainly isn’t your brain.”

Ianto had turned away from the window and was openly glaring at the man again as he hung up the phone.

“Not that it’s any business of yours but I do have a first class ticket and this suit is anything but mediocre. At least I’m not shouting “here I am, look at me I’m important” with flashy pink stripes on my shirt. And with you talking so loudly I couldn’t help but listen to your conversation.”

Ianto stopped talking; a little shocked at his own outburst. But he didn’t want anyone ruining his day, and no-one insulted his suits.

The man glared at him. Then his mobile rang again.

“Hello? What is it now? There’s a what? And it’s where.” The man pinched the bridge of his nose and took a deep breath. “I’m going to have to take this into the corridor. I can’t have prying ears listing into top secret Government business.”

With a final glare at Ianto the man slid open the door and stepped into the corridor.

Ianto let his head slump back against the seat. It would be okay. He didn’t have too far left to go before he was in London. Then he would start to enjoy his day.

~*~*~*~*~ 

Ianto arrived in Paddington with plenty of time to spare. Of course. This gave him time to walk the couple of miles to the Ritz taking a route through Hyde Park. On days like this he could almost miss living in London.

As he entered the hotel lobby his mobile rang. Looking at the screen he rolled his eyes. He decided it was better to take the call here and now, then he could go and enjoy his tea with his phone turned off.

“Hello Jack.”

“Hey Ianto. How’s it going?”

“It’s good thank you. How are you?”

“We’re fine.”

There was a pause

“What do you want Jack?”

“I don’t want anything. Just thought I’d call to make sure you’re having a good day.”

“It’s better now I’m off the train. Was sitting opposite an officious bore with a loud suit and louder voice.”

“And who’s being loud now young man?”

Ianto whirled around and found himself face to face with the man from the train. The man was looking him up and down.

“Twice in one morning. It really is my lucky day.” And with that the man wandered off again one eyebrow raised in disdain.

“Who was that?”

“Oh, that was the officious bore from the train.”

“Ah.”

“Yes.”

“Oh well, I’ll leave you to enjoy the rest of your day.”

“Thank you. And Jack?”

“Yes?”

“You’ve made polite conversation for long enough now. What do you want?”

“We can’t find the take out menus. We’re hungry.”

“Top drawer of my desk, folder labelled ‘menus’. You’ll find the most up to date one of everything in there.”

“Thank you Ianto.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Ianto…?”

“Yes Jack?”

“Are you still coming home tonight?”

Ianto smiled into his phone. “Yeah, I’m coming home.”

“Okay. Have a good day.”

“Thanks. And you.”

Ianto slipped the phone back in his pocket and headed for the restaurant door. He gave the maitre d' his name and let himself be shown to his table. He sat down in the high backed chair and looked at the menu that was placed in front of him.

As he read trough the list he became aware of the voice at the table behind him.

“Minister! How very good to see you. I’m glad you could join me. This seemed like a much nicer place to meet than either of our offices.”

Ianto groaned to himself and slunk down in his chair.

~*~*~*~*~

He had enjoyed his tea the best he could with the officious voice behind him. It seemed to go right through him and Ianto wasn’t unconvinced that the stranger hadn’t been trying to wind him up.

He left the hotel and walked the short distance to his last, and favourite destination of the day; Savile Row. Actually…just off Savile Row. He had discovered a small, quiet tailors, run by two unassuming brothers. They made exquisite suits and managed to tailor them not just to their customer’s measurements, but their personalities too. They didn’t have a big name like some of the others, and this was just one of the reasons Ianto loved it. The service was friendly and personal, the surroundings not too ostentatious. And the other clientele was much friendlier than in other, more exclusive, outfitters he had tried.

He pushed open the door and the two men, Frank and Justin, both turned to greet him.

“Mr Jones. It’s a pleasure to see you looking so well Sir.”

Ianto had long ago given up trying to convince the brothers not to address him so formally, so now just got on with enjoying it.

“Thank you Frank. It’s a pleasure to be back. Ah. You have everything out for me I see?”

The men both smiled at him. “You are indeed our guilty pleasure. We would never abuse any other customer’s kindness in such a way.”

Ianto smiled. He knew that Frank and Justin had both been brought up in the East End. Sons of one of the remaining barrowboys, their mother had worked as a seamstress and their love of tailoring and their skills had come from her. Their accents and way of talking came from watching too many films about how they thought people expected them to speak.

Ianto moved over to the side table where everything was waiting. He removed a packet from the inside pocket of his jacket.

“I bought a new blend down for you this time, I hope you like it.”

Frank and Justin knew how to make suits, but they did not know how to make coffee. After a few visits Ianto had finally caved and begged them to let him have a go. It was now a ritual and one that they all enjoyed.

“I am sure we will Mr Jones. Why don’t we get you measured and then Sir can relax with a cup of coffee while he looks at swatches.”

“That sounds like a great idea.”

Ianto let himself be led through to a curtained off area where Justin proceeded to take all the necessary measurements, before stepping back and letting Ianto re-dress. Moving back into the main area Ianto started to make the coffee while Justin and Frank headed into another back room to find swatches and samples they thought would suit him.

Ianto heard the door open behind him and made a conscious effort not to turn around. Not everything was a threat. He could relax here. He concentrated on what he was doing.

“Ah. I see they have a new coffee boy. Well about time. I take mine with cream and two sugars.”

Ianto froze at the voice. Him. Again. Even here. How was this fair? And the cheek of assuming that he was the … Ianto looked down at what he was doing. Okay, he could forgive that assumption.

“With respect Sir, this is a very special blend of coffee. Might I suggest you have it without the cream and sugar to get the full benefit of the flavours.”

“And might I suggest you remember who you work for. Cream and two sugars. Is that so hard to do?”

“Not hard at all Sir, but I’m not going to do it. And I’m very aware of who I work for, and it’s not you.”

Ianto turned around, a charming smile plastered onto his face and held out a cup of steaming black coffee.

“Oh, it’s you again. You appear to be following me today.”

“On the contrary. I have been everywhere first. You are clearly the one following me. Now, try this coffee.”

The man glared at him and his eyes narrowed, his mouth forming an annoyed pout, as if trying to decide his next move.

Before he could say anything the curtains pulled back and Justin walked through with a stack of swatches in his hands.

“The coffee smells as divine as always Mr Jones, thank you.” He looked up to see Ianto’s new companion. “Ah, Sir James. A pleasure to see you. I realise this is a little unorthodox, but have you tried some of Mr Jones’s coffee? He really does exquisite things with beans.”

The man looked at Justin and back at Ianto. Ianto kept his face carefully passive, with just the hint of a smile on his lips.

Frank had followed Justin through, and continued the conversation.

“If you would like to take a seat Sir James, we will be with you shortly. And may I second my brother’s suggestion to have some of Mr Jones’ coffee. Do you know each other? Both working for the Government that is.”

“Oh,” said Ianto smoothly, maintaining eye contact with Sir James, “I work for the Crown actually. We don’t bother too much with the Government. We come above their jurisdiction.”

With the look of a man chewing a wasp and trying to maintain upper-class dignity while he did it, the man finally took the still offered coffee cup, Ianto assumed more because he didn’t know what else to do than anything. Ianto then picked up his own and sat down.

Holding the cup casually in one hand he looked up at Justin and Frank, who, if he didn’t know better, seemed to be smiling knowingly at him. As Sir James continued to stare Justin said with a hint of a twinkle in his eye, “You mentioned earlier that your employer would be taking care of bill for today’s suits so we have bought you the most expensive swatch books out.” He turned to the other man. “Sir James, Frank is ready to measure you now and we shall find some swatches more suitable to your needs.”

Ianto sipped his coffee quietly as the other man stalked away, displeasure oozing from every pore, followed by Frank.

He caught Justin’s eye and the two men exchanged smiles, before the tailor’s professional face was swiftly put back in place.

A swatch book was placed in Ianto’s lap and Justin poured himself a cup of coffee. Sipping it he nodded at Ianto. “This is an excellent blend, you were right as always. Now, I think you will like this book; it contains our most tactile fabrics. I believe your employer appreciates that?”

Ianto smiled and settled back with his coffee. He was really beginning to enjoy today.


Page 1 of 2 << [1] [2] >>

Date: 2010-12-07 11:15 pm (UTC)
ext_16464: (Default)
From: [identity profile] dairwendan.livejournal.com
I don't watch Primeval, so I know I'm not getting the full benefit of this story but I still LOVE it!

Ianto's polite way of dealing with everything is classy and clever and I bet Frank and Justin know just EXAXCTLY what Ianto's employer likes in a suit! *LOL*

Date: 2010-12-09 12:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Thank you so much, I'm really pleased that you could still enjoy it. I'm glad that you liked quietly revengeful Ianto! Thanks again.

Date: 2010-12-07 11:30 pm (UTC)
ext_76727: (i love them dammit)
From: [identity profile] remuslives23.livejournal.com
Giggled out loud at the 'tactile' bit. They've obviously met Jack. ;)

Class and dignity - that's our Ianto. I've never see Primeval, though.

Date: 2010-12-09 12:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
*grin* I'm sure Ianto gets nooooothing out of the tactile suits ;o)

Thanks for commenting and glad you liked it and thought it was true for him.

Date: 2010-12-07 11:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] iamme-ur2.livejournal.com
lol, as a fan of BOTH shows I think you got both Ianto and Lester spot on!!!

Date: 2010-12-09 12:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Wow, thank you so much. Glad you liked it and thought it was right for them. Thank you.

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] iamme-ur2.livejournal.com - Date: 2010-12-09 02:51 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com - Date: 2010-12-09 03:00 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] iamme-ur2.livejournal.com - Date: 2010-12-09 03:18 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2010-12-08 12:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] canadian-jay.livejournal.com
LOL! Oh dear, James, James, James. xD And Ianto was great too. Loved it!
Edited Date: 2010-12-08 12:07 am (UTC)

Date: 2010-12-09 12:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Thank you so much, glad you liked it. Can't believe I ended up being so mean to Lester!

Date: 2010-12-08 12:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aviv-b.livejournal.com
Don't watch Primeval, but love the story! And no doubt that Ianto would never be wearing a garish shirt with his suit. Never.

Date: 2010-12-09 12:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Lol. Thanks, glad you could still enjoy the story. :o)

Date: 2010-12-08 12:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] moonfirefic.livejournal.com
This was awesome! Well done!

Date: 2010-12-09 12:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Thanks so much!

Date: 2010-12-08 12:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] emyrldlady.livejournal.com
ok, you made me giggle today. Thanks for that!

Date: 2010-12-09 12:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Glad I could make you laugh sweets. Thanks for commenting.

Date: 2010-12-08 03:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] milady-dragon.livejournal.com
Just adored that to pieces. Lester smack-downs are always fun! :)

Date: 2010-12-09 12:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Lol, and thank you so much, so glad you liked it.

Date: 2010-12-08 04:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] excentric397.livejournal.com
“You’ve made polite conversation for long enough now. What do you want?”

“We can’t find the take out menus. We’re hungry.”

This had me scaring the cat with laughter. Cute story. Thanks.

Date: 2010-12-09 12:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Lol, sorry to your cat. Glad you liked it and thanks for commenting.

Date: 2010-12-08 04:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kausingkayn.livejournal.com
You do know that I am absolutely in love with Frank and Justin now, I hope you know.
This was cute, and totally brightened up my day, even though I only knew half of the fandoms, I was still able to enjoy it!

Date: 2010-12-09 12:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Lol, Glad you liked Frank and Justin. Really pleased you could still enjoy this not knowing Primeval and that it helped your day. Thanks as always for commenting.

Date: 2010-12-08 04:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sallycandance.livejournal.com
This is lovely! Lester's tenor of voice is spot-on and Jack calling to make sure Ianto comes home that night is just awfully adorable!

Date: 2010-12-09 12:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Thank you so much. I'm thrilled you think I got Lester right and yeah...sometimes soppy Jack is just too cute. Thanks for commenting.

Date: 2010-12-08 07:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bigtitch.livejournal.com
Lol! That's brilliant - you've got both of them spot on!

Date: 2010-12-09 12:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Thank you so much, so pleased you liked it.

Date: 2010-12-08 09:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jaynedoll.livejournal.com
That was brilliant. I like a good Primeval/Torchwood crossover.

Date: 2010-12-09 12:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Thank you! Am working on a longer one with more of the characters meeting...

Date: 2010-12-08 09:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] echo-fangirl.livejournal.com
"I work for the Crown actually. We don’t bother too much with the Government. We come above their jurisdiction."
*snicker*

Oh dear, they really would rub each other up the wrong way, wouldn't they? :)

Date: 2010-12-09 12:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Lol, thank you, I'm glad you liked it. Any longer together and it would be bicker city. Thanks.

Date: 2010-12-08 11:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lsellersfic.livejournal.com
That was very funny although I feel sorry for poor Lester.

Date: 2010-12-09 12:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Thank you, glad you liked it. And I can't believe I ended up being this mean to Lester!

Date: 2010-12-08 12:37 pm (UTC)
fredbassett: (Default)
From: [personal profile] fredbassett
LOL, that was funny! I loved Lester's conversation with Leek, and Frank and Justin were great.

Date: 2010-12-09 12:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
*g* thanks, glad you liked it. Leek is great for getting super snarky Lester out! Thanks again.

Date: 2010-12-08 06:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] angelkitty101.livejournal.com
Fabulous! Love it!

And short of Ianto going 'Nah nah nah nah nah nah' there's not much more he can do!

Date: 2010-12-09 12:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Te he, thanks. Think Ianto is the only person I would ever let get the upper hand againt Lester.

Date: 2010-12-08 08:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lukadreaming.livejournal.com
This is loads of fun! I loved the phone conversation between Jack and Ianto, and sporfled at the tactile fabric *g*.

Frank and Justin were splendid!

Date: 2010-12-09 12:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Thank you so much, really pleased you liked those bits and my two new fellas. Thanks!

Date: 2010-12-08 08:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] black59.livejournal.com
superb! Ianto is a true gentleman!
I know Primeval and Lester : arrogant
while Ianto is all fine!
the tactile fabrics: funny

Date: 2010-12-09 12:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Thank you so much, really pleased that you liked this. Thanks for commenting.

Date: 2010-12-08 08:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ebonyfeather.livejournal.com
That was fun!
Loved Ianto's put down (We come above their jurisdiction) and I think this- With the look of a man chewing a wasp and trying to maintain upper-class dignity while he did it- has got to be the best description of Lester I've read.

Date: 2010-12-09 12:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Thank you, really pleased that you liked this. And thanks again. You totally made my day with your comment about my description of Lester.

Date: 2010-12-08 11:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] knitekat.livejournal.com
LOL. That's got so many good bits in it.

Date: 2010-12-09 12:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jooles34.livejournal.com
Thank you, so pleased you like it!

Date: 2010-12-10 09:48 am (UTC)
ext_422268: (Lester)
From: [identity profile] ravenja1170.livejournal.com
LOL, wonderful! I love every bit of it! Thank you so much for it!

Date: 2010-12-10 08:11 pm (UTC)
bk_forever: (Drool)
From: [personal profile] bk_forever
Lol! Lester has nothing on Ianto Jones! Ianto out-classes him effortlessly and with quiet dignity. Lester really is an officious bore!

Date: 2010-12-11 08:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] huskyfriends.livejournal.com
I haven't seen Primeval yet, but I love passive-aggressive Ianto.

Date: 2010-12-19 10:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rusty-armour.livejournal.com
I'm trying to catch up on some Primeval fic today, so I was glad that I could finally get around to reading this story. While I hate to admit it, I can picture Lester being this rude and officious. Ianto had my complete sympathy as I can't stand it when people talk loudly on their cell phones -- or loudly in general, really. I found it quite satisfying when Ianto got his revenge in the end and actually managed to render Lester speechless. *g*
Page 1 of 2 << [1] [2] >>

Profile

jooles34: (Default)
jooles34

January 2020

S M T W T F S
   1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
2627 28293031 

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jun. 9th, 2025 05:14 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios